mother: is it a boy or a girl?
doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor
sometimes I want to be a badass rockabilly girl with red lipstick and victory rolls and tight wiggle dresses and pumps and tattoos and other times I want to be a hippie with long flowing hair that sits in fields and makes flower crowns and wears loose floral clothes and burns incense and listens to The Grateful Dead
you get me
So this happened on facebook today….
That shit is called a “mini” or “micro” USB (can’t tell which one it is) for a reason, too… might wanna take a look at that, buddy.
I’ve been waiting so long to find this.
kinda weird that u can think about someone as much as u want and they have no idea
i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed
i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police
if you don’t think there needs to be better sex ed in school let me tell you that i almost slept with a guy from my health class until he took one look at my clit and said “ew why is your pee hole swollen like that? is that herpes?”